Mansa

My real name is NOT Mansa Musa. I was told that my family roots are somewhere far away in Mali and he is the most famous person from there - the richest man who ever lived in the World. I 2as told that king Mansa Musa is a distant relative of mine. On the other hand, if we go that far in history (as king from 1312 to 1337), I guess mathematically everyone born in Mali today is somehow related to him.

Anyway my family was wealthy and came to the United States for UN work. I was born during that time so I had automatic US citizenship. When I was 15 my parents died in an odd car accident. I was left with all of their property and I immediately left my school, dodged the social authorities' attempts with my money and after grieving my parents, I slowly started to live the way I wanted. Hamburgers, pizza and soldering. What could be better? It seems that my circumference has increased a bit.

Did I mention that I'm a genius? At the age of 11 I built a multi-channel radio telephone network to our house. At the age of 13 I started selling the microphone preamps I made to professional studios. When I was 14 the NSA came to our home and seized all my plans and threatened federal prosecution. That's how I learned to be careful! Since then I have been a big consumer of aluminum foil. Now I'll give you an essential hint: that hat must be grounded with silver! Otherwise it won't work.

When I was 17 years old I got excited about metants and I wished I was one myself. Maybe my genius is a metant origin? You don't know that! However, in addition to other activities, I started studying their secrets and thought I could come up with something similar.

In the end - as is well known - I got caught and Tailor practically hired me as his assistant. And it suits me just fine! And in his typical way, he gave me the first name he came up with and thus I am "Mansa" among my best friends.

So I sign this with my new name.